Didn’t realize it has been almost a month since my last post. Things have definitely improved. Hubby and I have gone to Boston for our second opinion which was very helpful. We where told that my team here did EVERYTHING right and that with my type of cancer very rarely do they see someone come back with a clean pathology report after chemo/surgery. Yes they would have preferred that outcome but the Dr out there was still very pleased with my results and how I had responded to treatment. She told us that she felt I was in fact CANCER FREE but we want to keep it that way. I was also staged at a stage 3 which we had assumed so surprisingly that didn’t through me for a loop. Also we apparently haven’t even gotten to the most important part of treatment which is for me Tamoxifen which I will take for at least 10 yrs, I am also supposed to keep those ovaries “turned off” so if my periods do return I will be giving another drug to stop them right away as we don’t want the ovaries to “turn on” again. Having them out is not something they want to do since they are more beneficial to leave them where they are. I have also been invited by our DR in Boston to join a clinical trial so we will be starting that after Radiation, and than I will truly be able to say that we have thrown EVERYTHING known at this time at this and hopefully it will be enough to keep me cancer free!!! On another note my Plastic Surgeon didn’t end up doing another fill, even though I wanted to go a little bigger he felt that airing on the side of caution knowing what radiation can do was a better course of action. So I’m about 290cc, but I’ve been assured that hopefully if the radiation doesn’t do any major damage I can still go bigger even the day of my surgery which will be in the fall, they can blow up the expanders more and let them sit like that while they’re doing prep work and than have a bigger “pocket” to put the final implant in. I do have an appt this Thursday as there’s a spot that is driving me nuts, not sure if it’s the end of a stitch or what but it feels like it wants to come through the skin and if I move just the right way it’s like getting stuck with a needle. I’ve noticed the same thing is just starting on the other side as well. Hubby thinks it’s do to the swelling going down and we have heard that sometimes a stitch will work it’s way to the surface and they either pull it out or trim it.Leave it to me to get the quirky things. I started Radiation last week and so far so good. The biggest pain is the parking lot and I’m not lazy enough to take advantage of the valet parking. Although this morning in the rain I was very tempted but did find a spot fairly close. The major problem is it’s a very narrow lot and small spots and most people don’t know how to park straight or within their lines. I am so loving the back up cam on the van, it has cut down on some stress of maneuvering out of those tight spots. I’ve been working out now 5-6x a week which has me feeling much better but I’ve only lost a couple pounds which is a start I guess and I’m only allowed to really lose 1-2lbs a week while on radiation but it’s still so frustrating to not be able to fit into a lot of my favorite jeans thanks to the weight gain from chemo:( I still have 12lbs to lose to be what I was when I started all of this and of course I would like to lose another 10-15 on top of that. Abbey’s recovered from Mono and went back to school two weeks ago, has returned to working out at the Y and has started softball practice daily, HOWEVER yesterday I get a phone call to come and get her from school she hurt her knee. Thankfully Hubby’s off on Mondays so when I was able to get her in to her orthopedic office (she’s my accident prone kid) in Saratoga which is about 20min from here he was able to drive us. Thanks to radiation something as simple as a drive like that is to much for me right now. Well thankfully she didn’t do major damage but she did dislocate her patella and tweaked all the muscles around it. So now she’s in a lot of pain and wearing a knee brace. Also no sports for at least a week and physical therapy 2x a week for a month. So she’s home from school today as she barely can walk but hoping to return tomorrow as she is still catching up from being out from Mono. Never a dull moment. Good new’s is I’m able to go out with out head wraps now πŸ™‚ woohoo it’s been two weeks so I’m now sporting the Charlize Theron buzz cut. Alyssa’s Orchestra teacher saw me last week at her concert and made her come home yesterday and tell me how awesome I looked and was totally pulling off the new hair do. It’s people and comments like that, that totally make my day and keep me feeling good. After all, going through everything I’ve been through can leave you feeling not so feminine at times and a little self conscious too. I always try to hold my head up high when I’m out and about not only because it is what it is but I want my children to learn from this as well and to know if you can hold your head up it makes you that much stronger.

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