As I sit here waiting to ring in another New Year it seems to have taken on a different meaning.. We usually throw a big New Years Eve party but this year I new it would be to much, so hubby and I had an early dinner at a new Thai restaurant followed by Starbucks, while the kids had some sibling time before the girls headed to their friends for a few hours and I get to spend some time with my two guys watching the New Years Eve coverage on tv and knitting. While 2012 drastically changed back in August I’ve learned that I’m stronger than I ever thought,found out who my true friends really are and who I can count on, that our hospital has a great cancer center with caring and compassionate Dr’s,nurses and staff, because shit I have Breast Cancer and got to experience it first hand. I’ve fought to live and survived 8 doses of Chemo over 16 weeks, and no have a different perspective on a lot of things, such as, that while having no hair is getting old and cold 😉 and the 20 freaking pounds I’ve gained thank you steroids, really aren’t that big of a deal in the greater scheme of things. I plan on starting 2013 with the hopes of a simpler year, meaning less focusing on the material things, getting rid of crap and clutter we really don’t need, living more in the moment(less multi-tasking), not stressing over things I just can’t control, and while I have surgery coming up two weeks from today knowing that I can handle that too and that yes it’s scary but it’s one more step in insuring that I hopefully never have to go through this again and another perk no pun intended ok maybe a little pun is I will have bigger maybe better boobs that will never sag when I’m an old old lady, because I firmly have to believe that there has to be a positive spin on everything we go through, whether it be realizing how strong we are, being able to bring awareness and help others, sadly making the children who have a parent going through this maybe stronger more compassionate people when they grow up because yea it makes me furious that my three babies have to experience a parent with cancer so there HAS to be something positive to come from it all. I plan on continuing awareness for Breast Cancer and raising money for it and so thankful that hubby’s shop has joined me in that act by donating part of sales from every cycling jersey and shorts kits,(and yes there’s a cool pink kit that I can’t wait to get and wear on my pink Kelly Bedford custom bike hubby has promised me) and in the spring their going to do a benefit ride too which I would like to take part in but not sure if I will be strong enough for, or if Oncologist will ok since radiation and  more surgeries may be around that time:(, getting back in shape again and knowing when out on a jog, or cycling and it hurts and I want to puke that I can work through it because after chemo and all I still have to go through than  I’m not going to let anything or anyone get the better of me ever again!!!I’m also looking forward to a year from now resuming hosting our big New Years Eve bash…So Happy New Year All MAKE IT COUNT!!!!!

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